Sunday, November 30, 2008

A bipolars' strange delirium

Rant time, ladies!!!
Honestly, we never understood mentally ill people like tinkerbell.
Thank God we are not like her. The constant up and downs, high and lows...
Yesterday, someone made a remark about David Caruso being "a nice and genue guy".(Just an opinion nothing more or less). Won't make all the bad things he did/does go away or even negate them.
Well, for poor sick tinkerbell this is the ultimate proof that he is a Gentleman. (Laughable, we know!!!)
Tomorrow someone most likely will post David Caruso is a bitch on wheels.....
We are sure tinkerbell will start to question Caruso' s sanity .
Tinkerbell hasn't any opinion of her own.
The poor sick creature is like a leaf in the wind. Desperate to belong somewhere at all she voices the opinions of those most likely to accept her.......when in reality nobody ever will... tough shit.

Real Beauty

As we get older,we begin to think about our looks,as sis says the middle age spread.I asked my man to tell me what he consider was real beauty,so here goes .

My name is Gil,I am sure a lot of you know that,my wife has a few other choice names for me at times. Beauty
Youth has it own special appeal.Young eyes are bright,young skin is taut and dewy,young bodies are limber and quick.
But beauty-----real beauty----requires something that youth does not have.Beauty is is not simply a youthful glow or collection of attractive features.It may,in fact,be just the opposite.Real beauty blooms from the soul of experience,knowledge and wisdom.It is more a reflection of inner attitudes than a physical image in a mirror.
That is the way I see beauty,now I hope "BABY" feed me and I can watch the game.Have a very nice day . GIL

Saturday, November 29, 2008

La Quinta Estacion - ME MUERO


For CUPCAKE and her Gil ........la Quinta Estacion .......Me Muero....Great voice and a great song for two lovers... you BOTH deserve it...

The Love Of My Life

I said I wanted to share with you,the reason why I feel so blessed,I will try to put them in order,this is the first,boy I have a lot ,Gil say he don't mind.....Hear goes.

Good morning Jean`ne,baby I adore you!!You are the most amazing woman.You make me feelloved and worthy of love.I have missed much in life because I didn't have a companion.You are the companion I have wanted for so long.You are the woman I want to share my life's adventures with.You are a loving and supportive lover and friend to me.I want to help you carry life's burdens and lovingly encourage you as you stretch out to be all you can be.I love to lay next to you and feel the warmth of you body next to mine,yum yum,I love to share the intimacy of talking from the heart.I feel like I have had so much love to give,and it has been bottle up inside me for so long,no one has been interested in opening the bottle,but you,joyfully surrounded and enveloped in the love that flows from my heart.You inspire and fully embrace the romantic man inside me.
You are the woman that welcome me with a big warm smile,with your arms outstretched.You are the woman that loves and longs for my hugs.You look at me with eyes full of love,when I touch you and look into your beautiful eyes,you warmly welcomes my loving kiss.You sweetheart are the woman I long to love until the end of my days.
I love you my darling.....GIL p.s. marry me.
This was the first of many,I found it in my pantie draw(giggles)when I have a bad day I read a couple.

Numbers

We have to admit we go there every other weekend - despite the warnings. Our friend offers us a house, good food, good company and a lot of amenities in a relatively safe area. Although, we repeatedly have been told that there is no such a thing like a safe place there. It can happen anywhere and any time of the day.
We are in awe of our friend who lives and works in this place. He has lived there all his life. His children go to school there.
Sadly, it has affected him as well - a friend of a friend ended up getting shot in broad daylight while getting gas...they say he worked for one (there are two groups) of them...485 (according to a local newspaper) dead people in the last two months. That's more than in Iraq at the same time.....
*
PS: We have been on the lookout for the "Manhunt for a stalker". Either the authorities must conduct this alleged "manhut" deep, deep undercover so that nobody notices or there is no manhunt at all. Just the prosperous fantasy of a random blogger - which is more likely....

Friday, November 28, 2008

WHAT"S THE POINT????



I would like to thank all the kind folks who cared enough about me to send me all the educational emails and articles over the past few years.
Thanks to you,I no longer open a public bathroom door without using a paper towel.
I can't use the remote in a hotel room because I don't know what the last guest was doing while surfing through the channels.
I can't sit down on the hotel bedspread because I can only imagine what took place on it since it was last washed.
I can't have lemon slices in my drinks because lemon peels have been found to contain nasty micro-organisms,including faeces.
I don't shake hands with anyone who has been driving because the number one pastime of people driving alone is picking your nose.
Thanks go out to the guy who told me about the poop in the glue on envelopes.
I no longer eat at KFC because their chickens are mutant freaks with no eyes or feathers.
I no longer use cancer causing deodorants,even on a hot day,and I stink.
Because you're so concerned about me I no longer drink COCA COLA because it can remove toilet stains.
I can't buy gas unless I have somone watch the car,in case a serial killer crawls in the back seat while I'm filling the tank.
I don't use glad wrap in the microwave.It causes cancer.
I no longer go to shopping centres because someone might drug me with a spritz of sample perfume then mug me.
I would never pick up money dropped in a parking lot because it was placed there by a rapist hiding under the car,waiting to grab my leg and pull me down.
Thankyou for letting me know I can't boil a cup of water in the microwave anymore because it will blow up in my face and disfigure me for life.
My eternal gratitude to you for telling me about the gallons of trans fats I've been ingesting for years,which now sit in my arteries like a ticking time bomb.
I now live with enough stress and anxiety to cause a massive heart attack and send me to an early grave.So I ask you,"WHAT'S THE POINT????? "

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Friendly Neighbours

Last Thursday I was working on my Laptop from 8 a.m. until 10.00 pm. I had a lot to do and we all know how time flies when one is having fun.
Somewhere around 10.00 pm , I was restarting my computer after it crashed. It started like aways - music, Microsoft sign etc.... until, yup until a mysterious message appeared: "Your profile is unknown. Access denied."
Huh? WTF? You can't be serious, can you? Soon I found out it could.
What to do?
Restarting again and again didn't yield any results.
Well, this girl took her laptop and knocked at the next door. Thankfully, the neighbours were at home. I introduced myself, asking if they did know a thing or two about computers and if yes, if they eventually could help me.
They not only knew a lot about computers. It turned out that one of them owned a computer-store in El Cajon. Eureka!
They asked me to come in, take a seat in front of the TV - it could be awhile. One started to work on my laptop and the other one searched various pages...I didn't ask what they did nor how they did what they did. I was glad that I had found help at this time of the night and so quickly.
They needed 2 hours to repair whatever went wrong, to restart and to get it working.
It was 02.30 am when I left their place - a happy camper again.
Upon leaving they advised me to change the package from Windows Vista to XP. It is the better program and makes less problems.
Thank you guys! You saved my day!








Thankyou Alan.I hope you're packin em in wherever you are.God Bless...

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

WEEKLY CHRISTMAS JOKE


Christmas is weird.What other time of the year do you sit in front of a dead tree and eat candy out of your socks???
----------------------------------------------------
How come Santa and Mrs.Claus don't have
any children???
Beause,Santa only comes once a year,and it's usually down a chimney.
----------------------------------------------------
After my grandson,Jakey,had opened his Christmas gifts,all signed," from Santa Claus",we noticed he looked rather sad."What's the matter honey ?"I asked.
"Well,I was really hoping Mom and Dad
would buy me something"...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA



Tuesday, November 25, 2008

COMPLETE IDIOTS

Late,one summer night,my boyfriend,Brian,and I were driving home from a dinner with friends .We had enjoyed ourselves thoroughly.We may have consumed a few too many cocktails.That bit's a little fuzzy.We were laughing
hysterically at a joke someone had told at dinner,when,
one of us,(we were never sure who)said,"Let's move in to-gether". It was a big moment in our relationship.

At the next traffic light we kissed.
That was all Brian ever needed,to take it to the next level.At that moment I wanted to take it to the next level too,quite urgently,but the light changed.
I telegraphed to him,in the usual ways of women,that I wanted him,right now.I saw his eyes gleam knowingly,and he started looking around for a romantic spot.
Unfortunately,we were on a major highway and there was nowhere to stop.We came to an area that had a few buildings.We were both a little desperate at this point.I was teasing him unmercifully,while he drove.Now that I think of it,we did have several potent drinks.

He finally saw a likely looking spot,an abandoned gas station.Grass was growing through the asphalt lot,but it was safe to drive on.We were still too visible from the road,so we drove around the back of the building.It was black as pitch back there.Okay,time for confession,we were more than a little drunk.

By this time I was tearing at his clothes,and he was understandably,distracted.
Suddenly,the front of the car dipped down with a crash and the wheels spun over some kind of unknown,unseen abyss.I screamed.Brian braked hard but too late.The rest of the car,carried by momentum,followed the front wheels into the great unknown.

We landed with a grinding,tearing,crash of tortured metal.We were too stunned to move for a moment.I wanted to be sure we weren't going to fall farther before I tried to open a door.From what we could see in the headlights,we had driven into some kind of square pit,about five feet deep.
"Well",said Brian,"I think this is where the pumps used to be."It's a good thing we didn't fall into the hole where the gas tanks used to be.That would have been a lot deeper."That's my Brian,a silver lining in every cloud.

I waited at a nearby coffee shop while Brian had the car lifted out with a crane.It had suprisingly little damage.I wondered what he told the truck driver.There just wasn't a logical reason for being back there.Knowing Brian,he told the guy the truth.We laughed about this incident for years.

I tell you what,though,It killed the mood.



Once Upon A Time-The Thingy-A-Jiggy

Let me tell you how it all began,2 am at work in the casino,my job,I was supervisor of the table games...slow night,I let some of the dealers go home,their choice. A company out of "RENO" purchase our hotel and casino,we were told they were a family operations,most things would stay the same.
This bunch of guys were on the floor,looking like mafia..all different sizes,if you seen the Spranos you known what I mean..they was a good looking bunch, even the old and fat ones...they decided to play before the signing were complete.
This man asked me what my name,asked did I wear contacts,I said no,they were mine,he said nice,enough of that.
Now the good part.....the first time we did the nasty,he asked me to marry him,I said no,mind you I divorce my ex,I was afraid to trust a man with money,I was just going to enjoy the ride..my ex just wanted to do what he wanted,as long as I had money to buy things I should be happy and quite,no no no not this girl,all or nothing.
My man showered,dress,told me he be back later that day,it was my off day.He said I should listen at what he has to say..he said I will marry him..he will give me time,he wanted to explain something to me,I better listen,I could tell my brothers,hell he didn't care,he was not afraid of them,I was his now....he told me he was 45 years old,had never asked a lady to marry him,had never lived with a lady,He has done a lot of living,seen a lot of things,but he would know the lady he wanted to marry when he met her,he will be true to me and he expects the same,if I can't deal with it,tell him now,because he plays for keeps.
I talk with Sis,she said I should follow my heart,I married my man 3 years later,I was 3 months pregnant...so ladies don't ever think a man 10 or more years older is to old,mine still jump to attention when I call.....a lot of times he do the calling..(GIGGLES)
Sometime he just call to say he love me..this is my second go around, I have no regrets.










David Caruso as vibrator?

Admittedly, we stole this delicious idea. Apparently, we know no shame...LOL

David Caruso as vibrator!
Inspired by the campy actor & made with his actual hair!
New (unused, purchased from manufacturer) silver bullet vibrator as base. Runs on 2 AA batteries (not included).
Intended for decorative purposes only.
This has paper maché, acrylic paints, india ink, epoxy and someone else's human hair on it -- none of these things belong in any part of your body, especially parts with mucous membranes. So don't shove up your nonobits.
Got it?
This is about 1" wide by 3" high.
*
I can already see Tinkerbell, Vickimoon, Sarakanne and AD salivate with pleasure....
*

Monday, November 24, 2008

WE'RE NOT AS DUMB AS WE LOOK,LADY

A woman in Britain told the court,she accidentally flushed her newborn baby down the toilet,because she didn't know she was giving birth.HELLOOO!
I've given birth a couple of times and there's no way you can mistake it for a loose bowl movement.

She told the coroner's court in Wales,that she only realized what had happened when she saw a foot in the toilet bowl.Oh,really!
What about buckets of blood,the umbilical cord,the after birth?CLUES LADY!

She knew she was pregnant by a colleague from work,so she had some idea when she would deliver.She said she pulled the baby out and tried to revive it.
Did she call 911 or even a neighbour for help.NOOO!
She put it in the trunk of her car.Did she have an explanation for that?NO.

The article did not say how it came about that she was arrested.She may have turned herself in.I'm guessing.However,the body was found,still in the trunk.
She was given a suspended sentence,for concealing a birth.

The court is going to look into the matter.DUUUHH

Honor The Child In You !

I would like to share a letter with you ....my man is very romantic,always leaving notes,cards in the most unsuspecting places, but here goes.

There is a little girl inside of you who never grew up.She has there from the beginning,She has seen,heard,experienced every aspect of life.She knows,she really knows who you are,and she never misses an opportunity to remind you.She knows your strengths,weakness,fears,likes,and dislikes.She knows who you are,what you can do;most of all, she knows when and how to act up.
Children will act up at the most inconvenient times.They will lose things.They will spill things on their clothes.They will speak out at inappropriate times.They will have temper tantrums.They will over eat.They fight,argue.They will make you late.All to get your attention.
Don't ignore your little girl.Make sure you greet her,nurture her,talk to her every day.Find ways to reassure her,make her feel safe.Let her know she is loved,welcome,valued.Let her play,and make sure she has plenty of toys.Don't forget to discipline her.Be firm but supportive,structured but flexible.Encourage her to try new things.Listen to her opinions.Make sure she eats well and get plenty of rest.You may be all grown up.However there is a little girl in you still trying to figure out who she is and what life is really about.Honor the child in you my love.
In the right moment,in the perfect way;you will be shown what to do,you will be told what to say,I will love you,I will honor you ...thank you for being the mother of my daughter,I will be home soon....GIL

Saturday, November 22, 2008

Guess who's coming to dinner!

Kid Rock runs errands in fur coat and shorts. An outfit we usually reserve for Thanksgiving at Grandma’s.
We have no words....
Do people really dress like that in California?
*
Found on:

WHAT MAKES A MAN SEXY?


What attributes define a sexy man?Is it one thing,two things or a whole cocktail of things?
Is it different for every woman.Do we each have our own preferred cocktail?
Is there a type of man who is sexually attractive to all women?Are there some universal qualities that make us all a little damp in the panties?
Yes,ladies,it's questions like these that keep me awake into the wee hours of the morning.
Personally,I don't think a man has to be all that handsome,or be a specimen of physical perfection.It certainly doesn't hurt ,but it is definitely not a requirement.That seems to fall more into the category of what men desire in a woman.
For a start,may I speak for all women when I say that cleanliness is usually a requirement? It's a lot sexier than filthy and stinky.That's one of those universal qualities I referred to.Reasonable good health must be taken for granted also,and a certain symmetry of features and limbs.For example,if he had one long arm reaching past his knees and one,scarcely ten inches from shoulder to fingertips,it might arouse your sympathy but not,I think,your libido.
Hair is an issue.Most women prefer it to baldness,and they like some body hair but not Neanderthal.
So we start with an average guy who seems to be overflowing with testosterone and sex pheremones.That's enough right there to make the nipples perk,but it's not enough for most gals.Here's where we start to customize our dream man.
Some ladies prefer a man with a slightly dangerous aura,a bad boy.It's sexy.I don't know why.I think it's a power thing.Others are attracted to a brilliant mind.I kind of get that.
Powerful men are sexy to many women.Do they make the women feel powerful by association?
Men with charisma(the power to draw people to them)can be irresistable.Add charm to that and you've got a nice cocktail right there.A lot of politicians have these qualities and celebrities(George Bush was sadly lacking in this department and McCain but Mr. Obama seems to posess some of each).
The way a man treats a woman can be very sexy.If he treats you like you're the most beautiful,sexy and important person in the world,how can you resist?
If he enjoys touching you and likes to kiss your neck or your hand,and keep his hand,possessively,on your waist or shoulder when you're out ,that's kind of sexy.
Gazing at a woman with a sleepily seductive look can be quite a turn on.If he adds a wink to that,some gals would drag him off to the bedroom right there.
A good kisser can thrill you to your toes.That's probably on the sexy list.
A considerate lover is sexy.One who shows you in oh,so many ways how much he enjoys your beautiful body is very sexy(moaning is good).
I've barely scratched the surface.Too many sexy attributes to mention.You have to make up your own recipe.You'll recognize him when you meet him.
I'd like to meet a man with a little pinch of everything I've mentioned.
I bet those are hard to find.

Friday, November 21, 2008

Just Plain Folks

A quiet day at my house is few and far between.
Yesterday after speaking at the Civic Center to abused women from the shelter,Trying to give them a heads up and what /where to go/do,they don't have to be abused in no form or fashion,there are people out there that will help.We are A group of ladies that see the need for change,trying to make a different.Our club is named "THE LAWYERS WIVES" our motto is ,when all else fail,give us a try.
My niece were there to help with my son, My daughter was in preschool,thank goodness...Nan wanted to go by the casting office,just to see what was going on.Lo and Behold..Sylvester Stallone will star in and direct "THE EXPENDABLES" in Feb.2009,Nan signed up to be an extra,she belongs to our actors guild.but in that business it's not what you know it's who,but I think that goes for everything.
We are a city on the grow..for the better I hope.There have been quite a few well known celebrities here making movies or just visiting....
The movie Leaves of Grass just wrapped up..starring Edward Norton and Tim Blake Nelson....There was "Mad Money" starring Queen Latifah and Katie Holmes...yet to be released "Streets of Blood" starring Val Kilmer and Curtis "50 Cent"Jackson. Each one was very nice,Katie is on the quite side.Josh Bolin made "W" here,now that was a hoot,he and his crew got into it with others at the Stray Cat Bar.My favorite was Kevin Costner..A real nice person and such a gentleman..He really enjoyed himself...When he left,he told everyone he would return,to give back some of what he is taking away with him...
Ladies and gentleman's,he returned with his band,gave a concert, raised a lot of money,had his wife and baby with him,everyone had a great time.
They are just regular people like you and I,some with a little more class than others, you have to have an insight on how to handle fame and fortune.
But all in all ,I really think it's how you see others and yourself,you have to love,respect yourself first,the other will follow.
"Happiness is a state of mind,not a set of circumstances.I can--and will--choose to be happy today".

Thursday, November 20, 2008

RUDE UNGRATEFUL PEOPLE


When I was at the mall the other day,I held the door open for a couple of ladies who were chatting with each other.They breezed through without even acknowledging me.I could have been a rubber door stop.

It's a little demeaning and it chips away at your good will.A subtle change takes place that you're not even aware of and the next time you're at that door you may be a little reluctant to be so courteous.What goes around,comes around.

A woman in front of me at the bank machine,loaded down with bags and packages was fumbling in her purse,I guess,for her bank card.She dropped a couple of bundles and her purse.The contents of her purse went everywhere and her change scattered ten feet in every direction.I rushed around picking up money and personal items(some of them,very personal) while she tried to get her parcels in some kind of order and kept repeating "SHIT,OH,SHIT".I handed her all her things and said"I think this is what you were looking for",holding up her bank card.She snatched it out of my hand as if I were stealing it and said "Yeah",and turned away.
Now,I didn't want her eternal gratitude,but a thankyou wouldn't have killed her,or a smile,or even a nod.My day didn't seem so bright and sunny after that.

Your reaction to someone affects their reaction to the next person they meet.If someone shows you courtesy or kindness,please be gracious and thank them and if you can do it with a smile it'll warm the cockles of their heart,and yours too.You might feel like passing that little act of kindness along to some one else.
As I mentioned before ,life is a circle.What goes around comes around.

I witnessed a selfless act of kindness in the supermarket once,when I was out with my daughter.It's the kind of thing you remember vividly even though you don't want to.
A young girl and her boyfriend were all over each other,and she was showing off her lovely body in a pink halter and pink tights.We heard a loud "OOOOHHHH",and turned to look.We saw a brown river of diarrhea pouring down one leg of those pink tights and coming out at the bottom.We stood for a moment,frozen in indecision,then as I stepped forward to offer help,she said to him"Give me your coat".
He said"It's my new leather coat".He had,easily,paid five hundred for that coat.
"Give me the damn coat",she said.
He said"I'm sorry,you're right.Here."

It was a short jacket,so she tied the arms around her waist and they left.Her shoe squished as she walked past.
I felt her humiliation.Imagine,in front of a boy you're trying to impress.
Like Jack Nicholson says in his movie,"The Bucket List","Never trust a fart".
I wondered if she ever appreciated the sacrifice he made for her,out of simple human kindness.

I must confess at this point,I don't always practice what I preach.This happened a long time ago but I'll never forget it, because I was bad.Going to a Christmas sale at a department store,I saw a lady coming out ,carrying a Christmas tree.She turned to screech at her children to keep up,and got kind of stuck in the doorway.I said,"Let me help you",grabbing the door.
She said"I don't need help",in kind of a nasty way.Soooo,I let the door slam on her.For about a second,it felt good.What can I say?




Freaking Bugs Me Out

There are so many,some more than others,right now it's my CITY and STATE government,some officials both city and state need to get their priorities in order.
You can't fix the problem by running off to Washington begging for more money,for the GM auto maker here to keep their head above water,we can't bail out the state,our Mayor vetoed the raise for the fire and police departments,those people is the backbone of the communities they serve,these brave men and women put their lives on the line each and every day,come on now ,the auto workers makes between $50/$90 an hour,maybe a cut in hourly pay will help in keeping more people on the job.
Senior citizens,needs more reliable health care ,be able to get food stamps,there are some couples receives about $14,000/$15,ooo a month,if they receive any help it was only $10/$20 a month,what can that but,a loaf of bread,quart of milk,dozen of eggs,what about the other 29 days..huh.
About 3 months ago,a 71 year old man was jailed for stealing a can chili.Someone mentioned it at my man's office ,he talked with the man,paid his fine ,got him help for him and his wife,they have no family just the two of them,we checks up on them regularly.
I get so pissed when people just talk,sit on there butts and do nothing.
The big 3 rescue stalls in "SENATE" hoop-dee-do,they don't want to give them a bond out of $25 million,if that don't bug the hell out of you nothing will.
Tel-markers bugs be to no end,always call at dinner time,tell them you don't have time ,they keep talking,if it's a machine I hang up,if a live person but brain dead ,I tell them off ,people that know me know it is not nice. My biggest pet peeve is a person that is a user of people.It don't take long to see through a person that's pretending to be something they are not. Me,what you see is what you get.

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Lately, at your local bank...

I don't know in which town this video was shot but it is hilariously funny and very popular amongst Internet-users.
It was sent to us by one of our many readers.
The quality is a bit poor but it doesn't detract from the fun.

WEEKLY CHRISTMAS JOKE


You know you've had too much holiday cheer when---

  1. Someone uses your tongue for a coaster
  2. You start kissing the portraits on the wall
  3. You see your underwear hanging from the chandelier
  4. You have to hold on to the floor to keep from sliding off
  5. You take off your shoes and wade in the punch bowl
  6. You hear a duck quacking and it's you
  7. You complain about the small bathroom as you leave the closet
  8. You refill your glass from the fish bowl
  9. You ask for another ice cube,then stick it in your pocket
  10. You yawn in the face of this really boring guy,and realize you're looking in the mirror
  11. You pick up a roll and butter your sleeve
  12. At the dinner table you ask the hostess to pass a bed pan
  13. You have a conversation with the rubber plant and it answers you
  14. You realize you're the only one under the coffee table

HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

The ultimate truth 2


Sorry ladies, but I just can't help it....snicker.
*
You know they say....."Self-knowledge is the first step toward (self-) improvement"..Ain't that the truth, DAVE! And you are right of course....because YOU REALLY DO SUCK...!!!

Kids Say The Darnest Things

A lot of movies is being filmed here.My man's firm represent the film companyies here,we asked his colleagues and their wives over to discuss the latest project on hand...the men went into the study to talk...the wives and I talked about our kids and what a joy they are,Gilly as usual had to show everyone how greedy he is.
The men's joined us ,everyone laughing ,enjoying themselves,Mary asked Gil what he was getting me for Xmas..Gil says he was going to give me a baby,maybe he could keep up with me.My darling little girl go to her daddy,hands on hips,saying no daddy no ,daddy you are so silly mama got Gilly,give mama a puppy,mama got two jugs and Gilly wants both of them.

Monday, November 17, 2008

MY HERO-PART TWO

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Sunday, November 16, 2008

MY HERO



I don't know why I felt compelled to set out that day.
It had been snowing steadily for two days.Visibilty was poor.Only major roads were being cleared and the plows were working night and day.Secondary roads were completely snowed in.The weather report promised that it would clear up later that afternoon.

I had just graduated from college and I needed to work on my portfolio.I had been given permission to work in the studio at school,and use their photograpgic equipment.A graphic artist's portfolio is vital to landing a job.It could have waited a day or two,but,Like a total idiot,I insisted on going.

One or two of our neighbors had plows on the front of their trucks and had cleared a path to the main road.The main road wasn't too bad although,I could only see about fifty feet.It was going to clear up,right?
I got about thirty-five kilometers.That was a hell ride,the car skidding all over,in spite of snow tires.The snow seemed to be falling thicker now and visibility was worse,about twenty feet.Bloody,Canadian meteorologists.They check the weather by looking out the window,make predictions by tossing a coin.

I actually made it to the secondary road that led to the school.Only fiteen kilometers to go.The snow had drifted in on the road and obliterated all signs of it.The car inched forward.Visibilty became zero.
Even though I couldn't see the road,I ploughed on,regardless.At this point I had to reach someplace safe.
I had no idea if I was on the road or not.I wasn't.My right tire went over the edge of the ditch and I lost control of the car.Down I went into a six foot ditch,filled with snow.The front half of the car was completely buried.Both front doors were blocked.I couldn't open them.I flipped over into the back seat.The back of the car was sinking also.

After much shoving and ramming I got one of the doors partially open and crawled out into a completely white world.God help me,I had no sense of direction.I was near the road,right?All I had to do was wait for a car,going in any direction.
"Fool,no one is driving today."
For an hour and twenty minutes,I either stood outside looking in all directions for a car,a building,a light or I crawled back into the car,which had stabilized,and tried to stay warm under a blanket.Finally,I saw what seemed to be headlights.I started walking to meet it,waving my arms and a big jeep nearly ran me down.The driver couldn't see a little snow covered person against a white background.

He stopped and threw open the passenger door."Get in," he said.Oh,it was so nice and warm.I explained about the car.He said I would need a tow truck to get it out of there.
"I know where there is a dealership,maybe they can help you. I think they're open",he said cheerfully.He drove me to the opening of a long driveway,about half a kilometer.It was impassable"I guess you'll have to walk the rest of the way,"said Sir Gallahad."You can see it from here."I could see it.The snow had stopped.Those Canadian meteorologists sure know their business.

I thanked him and walked on.I was wet from thawing out in the jeep and now I started to freeze.I checked my fingers.They were white.That is a bad sign,the beginnings of frostbite.I pushed on.The deep snow slowed my progress.I couldn't see any lights on at the dealership."Oh please let someone be there."

PART TWO TOMORROW

Shit, I have a virus!

It is the bane of every laptop-owner. It is annoying and sadly it can't be avoided. Everyone gets one - sooner or later.
A mean ol' virus!
Okay, admittedly my lappy was giving me signs......Norton alerted mewith little signs to a possible infection and asked me if it should take action - meaning a virus check. Since I am quite busy working my lappy I ignored this message.
Obviously, that was a mistake.
Last Monday my lappy started to act funny. Everytime I shut it off it deleted ALL my bookmarks AND my 3 MB of pictures. Thank God I have saved those pictures on a CDR. And because it is so much fun - every time I start it it installs "personalizes" all programmes ANEW. Meaning it needs 3 (!) minutes to be ready.
A-N-N-O-Y-I-N-G.
A friend who owns a business and who has an IT-expert in his employ promised me to have this expert check this matter. The expert suggested either a virus or Vista acting up. We'll see. The worst thing that can happen is that the whole set up will have to be installed anew. Or he is going to be pushing a few magic buttons and my lappy (which is only 2 months old!) is like new again...

What do we learn from all this? Better never ignore warning signs!

Saturday, November 15, 2008

MESSAGE TO CUPCAKE AND VIXEN


FIRST JOKE OF CHRISTMAS 2008

Three men died on Christmas Eve and
were met by Saint Peter at the Pearly Gates.

"In honor of this holy season",Saint Peter said,"you must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven."

The first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter.He flicked it on."It represents a candle,"he said.

Saint Peter said",You may pass through thePearly Gates".

The second man reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys.He shook them and said",They're bells."

Saint Peter said,"You may pass through the Pearly Gates."

The third man started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of women's panties.

Saint Peter raised an eyebrow and asked,"And just what do those symbolize?"

The man replied,"These are Carol's."

Friday, November 14, 2008

The blonde and the traffic light


















After all the talk about dead bodies, violence, crazy tinkerbells , their brain-farts and anger-management I think we deserve some entertainment....It is so good NOT to be a blond! Right, ladies?
(Click on pictures to enlarge!)

Understanding Anger & Diversion

People can call me names,accuse me unjustly,slander me behind my back,but they cannot change who I am and the truth I know about myself.Very often I can get so caught up in the injustice and unfairness of the actions of others,I sometime have a temporary lapse of memory.I may say or do things which,to an uninvolved observer,give credence to the very things people are saying.
Always remember who you are.Know that you are never required to apologize to anyone for being yourself.People may not like it,but they like me,are still growing.I have conducted myself honorably,with good intent,giving 100% of myself and my energy to my endeavors,I do not and will not waste time defending myself against what others may call me,really don't give a "SHIT"
The truthneeds no defense.It will stand on its own in the face of any opposition and against the most powerful adversary.I'm willing to make amends if I have in fact acted out of principle or spoken hastily.I'm prepared to engage in self-reflection and correction,(don't get your hopes up )When I do these things and act with a clear conscience,I will not be deraiked by what other people say.
There's no reason anyone should be perfect just for me.I like my family and friends just the way they are.

The car in front of the house

Santa Ana winds turn a day in November into a warm summer day with temperatures far into the 90's. Being outside is highly uncomfortable. One flees into climated shopping-centres or stays inside - enjoying the cool of the house.
The white Nissan with California licence plates was already there when we arrived at our friends' house. And it was still there the next afternoon when we left to grab a bite to eat. And it was still there when we returned after dark. Which is very unusual since our friends' house is in a gated aera where people just don't park cars* outside their secured homes.
The next morning we woke to the noise of numerous two-way radios. We stepped out on the balcony to check out what the humdrum was all about.
At least 15 people were gathered around the car. Half of them police officers in uniform, the rest plain- clothes people (REAL CSI's we guess) photographing the car from all angles, opening doors and doing some more photographing.
The odor that reached us on the balcony was really bad. Like rotting fish/ bio waste. Very nasty.
Members of the local newspaper arrived. Two lifeless bodies ,with their hands tied in the back, had been found in the car. Obviously, they had been dead for three days.
Our friend who drove us to the airport a few hours later shrugged it off - according to him dead bodies turned up every day in his city (289 since October!). Although, this was the first time it had happened in his street....

*The cars in the back of the picture are ALL police vehicles.. Click to enlarge picture!

Thursday, November 13, 2008

EYE OF THE BEHOLDER

Art can be beautiful at first glance.Some-
times you have to look a little deeper to find the beauty.Sometimes it's just fucking ugly,but there is always someone who sees something wonderful in it.
Paintings and scultures can speak to you.They can speak volumes if you can tap into the mind of the artist.

I can prove my point.I painted a really fugly picture,but there were actually a few people who appreciated it.They saw something in it.
It's all in the eye of the beholder.

Art sales may be slow at the moment but the art itself does not lose any value just because we're having an economic slump.You can't buy a Rembrandt cheaper just because we're in a recession.
It keeps accruing value,albeit,probably a little slower.People usually put their rare and valuable things away until there's a financial upturn.They won't sell out.

Art is still a good investment and always will be.It's irreplaceable.

Friendship

"A true friend is the greatest of all blessing,and that which we take the least to acquire"
We don't typically set out to make a friend the same way we set out to get a job or win the attention of someone we're attracted to.Friends just happen. WE work we play together,discover that we share some things in common,and gradually a friendship grows.Or we face some hardship or misfortune together,and a friendship arises through mutual support/respect.
We make friends casually,but once they're part of our lives,we should be careful not take them for granted.Our friends make us better,stronger,and happier--and we should do the same for them.

I remember every day how lucky I am in my friendships. Today I'm going to tell my friends how much I appreciate them.

The ultimate truth..


Sorry ladies, I just had to.....LOL

Worth 10 million bucks???


At the same auction Metallica drummer Lars Ulrich sold his Untitled Basquiat painting for a cool $14 million ($2 million more than its estimated sale price), Francis Bacon's (Not to be confused with the Elizabethan philosopher) Study For Self Portrait failed to hit its estimated auction price by about $10 million.
In a sign of consumer belt-tightening, the 1964 trypticht peaked at only $27.4 million - falling drastically short of its expected $40 million. Another Bacon triptycht sold last May for $86.2 million, setting a record for the Irish painter who died in 1992.
When the bidding stopped at 27.4 million the esteemed auction house halted the proceedings, to a chorus of gasps.
The art auction world is not faring the economic decline very well, with 30-40% of lots going unsold, and the prices of sold pieces disappointing expectations.

MEN CAN DRIVE YOU CRAZY



My husband is a great guy,heart of gold.So,why is he trying to drive me crazy?

When he walks through that door in the evening,the greeting ceremony between him and the dog takes a good five minutes.You'd think he had been gone for five years.He sometimes picks the dog up,plants a kiss on its head and walks right past me with a nonchalant,"Hello honey".
Right there folks,he's put the wrong foot forward for the evening.On the kiss scale,I rank below the dog.That sets the wrong mood for dinner.His brief case and shoes get dropped in front of the door for people to trip over as they come in,hit the wall opposite and knock all their teeth out.His coat gets gets thrown on the most convenient chair.The closet is right by the front door.

The next wrong move is dropping his tie on the kitchen counter as he comes in to sniff the cooking aromas.Also,keys, wallet,and assorted junk,dropped on the counter or on the little island where I'm preparing food.

He goes to the bathroom and I know without looking,the seat will be left up and the towel will be dropped,crumpled,by the sink.The next part of his routine is to get a cold drink and a cookie,tell me what a lousy day he had and leave cookie crumbs and orange juice rings on the counter.Boy,I'm usually so horny by this time,I just want to jump his bones right there and then(sarcasm).

He wanders off to the den to read his newspaper and drop the pages all over the floor.
One of my favorites,is when he leaves the cabinet doors open in the kitchen.You have to be careful you don't bash into one, face first,or trip over a lower one,or bang your hip on an open drawer.
Before I get pissed off all over again,let me reiterate;my husband is a great guy,heart of gold.
If I complain,apparently,I'm being petty.WHAT?I should be grateful I have to pick up his dirty clothes?
I have followed everyone's suggestions,to try and improve his habits.Nothing works.I'm more annoyed with his mother.What was she thinking?

Lately,he's been nagging about spending.The economic crunch has made him nervous.I've always handled the finances.No problems.But he questions every penny.He even had the nerve to question a ten dollar receipt.TEN DOLLARS!!
I really wanted to tell him he was being petty,but I remembered,he's a great guy,heart of gold.
Then,one Saturday morning,he was using the truck.He didn't notice the camera perched on the traffic lightand he drove through a red light.HA!HA!HA!It cost him a hundred and eighty dollars.
I have the picture to prove it.It's a nice blue truck.I put the picture on the fridge.That shut him up,and for two days he hung up his coat,put his shoes away and holy of holies put the seat down. Great guy etc.etc.