Thursday, February 06, 2014
Dear Maxy ,
I have a 40-year-old daughter who is lazy . When she injures herself, has surgery or is sick, I wait on her like she's a baby . But I recently needed surgery myself and she has no interest in helping me at all .
A while back, I hired someone to clean her bedroom . It took two days. It was absolutely disgusting. Now that I can't pick up after her, it's getting bad again . If I say anything to her, she throws a tantrum . I'm getting too old for this .
Can't Take the Arguments
Dear Can't ,
You're too old ?
Your daughter is 40 and still lives at home and expects her mother to clean her room . I do not understand some parents who encourage their children to behave like babies and treat parents like servants and then complain when they do .
Unless your daughter is incapable of holding a job and living independently, tell her it's time she found a place of her own . At the very least , insist she pay you rent . Do not clean her room . Close the door and let her deal with her own mess .
Dear Maxy ,
I am a caregiver for my husband, who was diagnosed with Lewy body dementia . Before that time, I had never heard of Lewy body dementia, nor did I know that there are actually four distinct dementia classifications; Alzheimer's , Lewy body, frontal lobe and vascular.
At this time, there are 1.3 million Americans who have been diagnosed with Lewy body dementia, which is the second most common progressive dementia and is believed to be under-diagnosed .
These individuals are drug sensitive and the incorrect drugs can cause full blown dementia .
Anyone who shows sign of dementia should see their primary care physician or a neurologist for proper diagnostic testing .
Trinidad , Ca.
Dear Trinidad ,
Thank you calling this to my attention .
Aside from the familiar cognitive symptoms of dementia, Lewy's includes visual hallucinations, as well as movement disorders that may be related to Parkinson's .
The earlier it is diagnosed, the sooner the treatment can begin . Those who wish to know more about Lewy body dementia can contact www.lbda.org .
Dear Maxy ,
I recently lost my job and had to move out of my apartment . I currently live with my best friend and her husband . It has been six months since I lost my job and my friends husband is giving me hints that I should find a place because I am getting in the way of their relationship .
I called my parents to see if I could move back home into their house and they told me no and I should find a woman's shelter to move into until I can get my life together. I had a bad experience in a women's shelter many years ago . I am hurt and disappointed that my parents made a suggestion like that .
I have a couple of dollars saved up, but I do not know how long it will last . I used to work in the accounting department of a hotel chain and I am ready to work and have my own place again .
Nowhere to Turn
Dear nowhere to turn ,
Comb your memory to see if you have any other friends or a relative who may take you in temporarily . If it is possible, just rent a room in a decent single women's boarding house or at the YWCA.
If necessary, go to a shelter for a short time . Research to find the safest and cleanest ones in your area . Spend your days looking for a job, perhaps outside your field . Be prepared to take a job below your qualifications just until you rebuild your savings.