Thursday, December 19, 2013

Ask Maxy

Dear Maxy,
I  just finished watching  a piece  on the news  about young people  assaulting  others  and calling it a game . It seems  they walk up to people  and throw the hardest punch  they can to the face in an effort  to knock  someone out .
In one instance, a man was  hit so hard, he fell face first  to the curb  and fractured  his skull . He died  and the person  who hit him  was charged with manslaughter . The kids being interviewed  were all laughing  about it, as if  it were some  sort of party .
The sad part is that they are raised  as if their actions  have no consequences . Parents, teach your children before it's to late .
Worried Adult

Dear Adult ,
It's sad to see a world where children  think assault is a sport, where the constant media  barrage  publicizes  and glamorizes  violence  and where these immature  teens either  don't understand  the consequences  of their actions  or think prison  is simply another badge  of toughness . We doubt  they'd  find this activity  so much "fun" if the victim was someone they cared about .
We've forgotten  how to be  civilized  to one another, nor do we value it . Parents not only  need to teach  responsibility to their children, but they have  the added burden of combating  the multiple  pernicious  influences  around them . It's hard to raise  kids these days  and I  commend  those parents who manage to do it well .

Dear Maxy ,
I have a friend who often asks : "What's happening  ?" But when I attempt to tell her, she rudely interrupts  and says, "It don't want to hear about it !" It doesn't matter what the subject is . She even interrupts  for others, saying, "She doesn't want to hear about it !" She also cuts  me off mid-sentence and finishes my thoughts for me . Attempting to carry on a conversation  with her is hurtful  and I find her to be rude .
However, If the conversation centers on her, it can go on forever . Also , if she is trying  to impress people, no matter how boring the conversation, she hangs on to every word . I have to deal with this  "conversation bully " often . How am I suppose to handle her ?
Ears Hurting
Dear Hurting ,
You are already aware that your friend is self-centered  and only interested in conversation  that is somehow  beneficial to her. When she  asks, "What's happening ?" she doesn't really want to know . It's simple her way  of saying hello . Here are your options : You can tell your friend  how rude this is  and ask her  to be more considerate ; you can restrict your conversation  to topics  that stroke her ego ; you can find other friends .

Dear Maxy ,
I just lost a lot of weight  and want to get rid  of clothes  that don't fit  anymore .
I have a friend  who is about  the size I used to be . have a lot of great suits and dresses  and different things she may like .
I am unsure  of how to bring  it up to her  so that  I don't offend her .
Sometimes people  get weird  around weight loss . Do you think I should offer the clothes to her  ?
Giving Spirit

Dear Giving Spirit ,
It is  fine  for you  to contact  your friend  about giving  her clothing . What you should  not do is emphasize  your weight lost . Tell her  that you have identified  a number  of clothing items  that you want to give away  and that you thought  she might want them .
If she  is interested, arrange a time to show or share  them with her .  By leaving your weight  out of it, you make it easier for her  to be comfortable .

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