I am a 23-year-old man . I served in the army and deployed to Afghanistan. I was medically discharged for PTSD about two years ago .
I'm currently going to school to be a firefighter but I'm afraid I've picked this field not because it interests me but because I cannot go back into the military .
I'm working in an office now and I hate my job . Before this, I worked at a department store and as a machinist . But Maxy,
I can't see myself anywhere but with the military . What should I do ?
Those who have been in the military sometimes have difficulty accepting a job that is less exciting or challenging . The intensity of the military experience and the bonding with one's fellow soldiers can make everything else pale in comparison . For some, it takes a great deal of time to readjust . Check out military.com for other job opportunities for veterans and also Career One Stop ( careeronestop.org ) at 1-877-345-0502 . Military OneSource offers suggestions and website links for transitioning military members that might also be helpful for you ( militaryonesource.mil/transition ).
Dear Maxy ,
I have been a widower for almost three years . For the past six months, I've been seeing a nice lady for a friendly relationship . She also lost her spouse several years ago .
My lady friend and I have dined out a few times and she has questioned why I still wear my wedding ring . Maxy, my wife was my only love . We were together more than 60 years . I will never love anyone like that again .
Is it right for me to wear my wedding ring ? Or if I am seeing someone, should I put it away ? My friend says she's uncomfortable when I have it on . I care about this woman, so please tell me what I should do ?
You actually have two issues; How long should you wear your wedding ring once you have began dating again....and is a casual girlfriend of six months entitled to tell you to remove it?
Wearing your wedding ring gives the impression that you are still connected to your first wife and not ready to move on .
Nonetheless, wearing it is your decision, not your girlfriend's . Widows often remove a wedding band and wear it on their other hand or have it refashioned into a necklace or other piece of jewelry, allowing them to continue wearing it in a less prominent location . You might consider this when you are ready . Your strong feelings toward your wife would indicate you are not ready to move forward just yet.
Dear Maxy ,
I worked on a project that required my lawyers services . The payoff was supposed to be significant, but in the end I'm the one that spent money while the whole deal went south . I am bummed about the death of the project, but I am also out a few housand dollars .... which I don't have ... because I have to pay for legal services . I'm not sure what to do . I simply do not have the money I owe him . I have been ducking him for the past couple of months but I don't like that feeling . How can I handle this situation with my lawyer when I realistically do not have the money I owe him ?
Face the Music
Dear Face the Music ,
Start by reviewing your finances . Figure out what you can pay your attorney . While you may not have the full amount, chances are he will appreciate a good faith effort to pay his fees . Determine what you can pay on a monthly basis and then ask him if he will accept that payment plan . Apologize for not having the full amount up front . Remind him you had every belief that the deal he was brokering for you was going to come to fruition. Since it did not, you are low on cash . Assure him that if you come into greater resources, you will up his monthly installment .